The Continuation of "Not Meant to Be"

I reviewed this blog and realized my last entry was October 2009.

Today's April 3, 2010. Time flies. Cliche? yeah. I've written that statement more often than I should be.

What has transpired between October 2009 and today can be described a series of "dramas". Looking back I can't believe I've allowed myself to be part of it. Yet, these dramas in a lifetime sets what you are now or maybe in the future. Makes you realize a lot and equips you with more when you go through the same dilemma again.

I welcomed 2010 with tears. MAde me scared for the first 2 hours after midnight. Fireworks were sparking and booming, yet, ironically, I was crying. For a while I thought, OH NO, this might mean a year of more heartaches and rejection. I remembered Mom telling us when we were kids to jump up as high as we can so we'll grow taller.

As I write this now I guess I can say I'm stronger. I can filter my emotions, my desires, my wantings...better. or perhaps, the best word to use is, i'm tapering off a few of unnecessary things in my thoughts or heart.

However, I can also say I've added more cushion. AS a friends once told me, if I had a "wall" before, now it's grown to be "The Great Wall of China". made me laugh. That was the best way of describing it.

Bottomline is, everything happened because..I wasn't meant yet to be in a relationship. The odds were against us...or maybe just me. IT just wasnt meant to be.

Bottomline is, if someone really loves you, he'll do everything to win you.....over and over again. that's it.